5 Tips to Reclaim Your Life (and no, you shouldn't feel guilty about it!)

What if spending your days doing things for other people isn’t enough for you? What does that mean for your life? Where do you come into it?

It’s a question that sometimes sneaks into the quiet moments of our lives, often when the house is still, the dishes are done, and the demands of the day momentarily pause. Sometimes it doesn't sneak in, it feels like it smacks you in the face while you're busy doing the things you don't really want to be doing! What if everything you’ve poured your time and energy into still leaves you feeling unfulfilled?

Does it mean you’re ungrateful? Absolutely not. It simply means you’re human.

Is Your Life Being Hijacked?

Life has a way of piling on the to-dos. Washing, cooking, cleaning, shopping, working, gardening—they all need to be done. They keep the wheels turning, the household running, and everyone else’s needs met. But what if they’re not the things that light you up? What if they’ve become a rut rather than a rhythm?

When Do You Decide to Make a Shift?

That persistent “what if” question is often the nudge you need. It’s your inner self quietly urging you to consider where you fit into the life you’ve built. If you’ve been feeling stuck, tired, or uninspired, it might be time to ask: When do I decide that enough is enough?

Shifting your life doesn’t mean abandoning your responsibilities or disregarding the needs of those you care about. It means carving out space for yourself within all that you do. It’s about finding a way to feel uplifted when you get out of bed, energised by purpose and meaning.

The Weight of Expectations

Sometimes, it feels like people take you for granted. They expect the meals to be cooked, the laundry to be folded, the calls to be made—and they expect you to do it all. Requests pile up on top of your already busy day, adding more to your plate while you’re already balancing everyone else’s needs. And yet, who’s doing those things for you? When do your needs take priority?

As you sit with these thoughts, it’s easy to start ruminating. You might feel stuck, questioning why no one seems to notice or appreciate your efforts. This is often where we start to enter the drama triangle—slipping into the role of the “victim,” feeling powerless and unseen, or the “persecutor,” blaming others for the way your life has become. (For more on the Drama Triangle, click here.)

This spiral doesn’t serve you. It’s a signal, not a solution. It’s time to shake it off and reclaim your life.

Where to Begin?

1. Reflect on What Lights You Up Take a moment to think about the things that make you feel alive. Is it art, nature, learning something new, connecting with others, or creating something meaningful? Write it down. Acknowledge what matters to you.

2. Start Small You don’t need to overhaul your life overnight. Begin by dedicating a small slice of time each day to something that brings you joy. It might be as simple as reading a chapter of a book, going for a walk, or journaling your thoughts.

3. Reclaim Your Time Look at your day and identify where you might be overcommitted or doing things out of habit rather than necessity. Learn to say no where you can, so you can say yes to yourself-it's called setting boundaries.

4. Set Intentions Intentions guide your actions. If you intend to bring more joy, purpose, or creativity into your life, start aligning your daily choices with those intentions.

5. Seek Support You don’t have to do this alone. Share your thoughts with a trusted friend, join a group of like-minded individuals, or consider working with someone who can help guide you through the process.

The Truth About Ruts

Ruts are familiar, but they’re not permanent. They’re simply grooves worn into your daily life by routine and repetition. Stepping out of them requires intentional effort, but the reward is a life that feels more balanced and fulfilling.

So, what if you decided to make a shift? What if you prioritised you? What if you allowed yourself to accept that your happiness and purpose are just as important as the tasks on your to-do list? 

What if, instead of asking “what if?” you started asking, “what’s next for me?”  The key take-away is that it's up to you to create the change you want in your life. If you need help, I'm here when you're ready.